Thursday, October 27, 2016

THIS IS TWENTY-EIGHT

Thursday, October 27, 2016
I know. You probably expected the "grandest" birthday shoot ever, but this time it was different. I wanted to show a non-typical side of me that not everyone gets to see, and that's me being in the privacy of my own home, in pajamas at 7am with hair and makeup from the night out before. Okay, maybe I added a little tinted lip balm but come on, how could I not. And no, I usually don't have the windows open at all on a daily basis, maybe that's why I'm so pale. Hmmm...
This year has been the most difficult yet for a lot of different reasons. It has tested my every emotion, including some I didn't even know I could feel or that I had in me (as crazy as that sounds). There have been times where I have been happy, tried new things, explored new feelings, met or reconnected with people, and other times when it of course was not as great. I have cried and yelled at the top of my lungs, had the lowest self-esteem ever, I've questioned my life (still do) in so many ways, wondered and felt scared for the future, I've started getting anxious about reaching 30 and entering a new decade, not to mention my love for champagne grew increasingly in the past 365 days. For someone who is used to "babysitting" her drink, this is a completely new adventure of sorts (if you look at it the way I do). I'm not sure how to feel about turning 28...I know that every year I say the same thing, but the stranger thing is that sometimes I get in that mindset of "okay, this is life, it's a cycle that I cannot stop", and suddenly I'm alright. I really am not afraid of death, I'm afraid of growing older if you wanna go to those extremes. I think I'm more afraid of the thought of just HOW I'm going to die...but let's not get carried away. As if this 'dreadful' day isn't stressful enough (insert the popcorn emoji here for the dramatic effect). In all seriousness, I really do feel as if I have "matured" in different ways, maybe I don't know how to cook or hate making my own doctor's appointments, but I mean in other ways. I have (and still am) made better judgements of people and things, I am trying to learn how to handle certain situations and/or feelings, and even though I do have a loud voice (again, thanks parentals), I don't think I yell as much as I used to unintentionally (that last point is more towards my family ha!). I may be feeling as if I am finally learning HOW to be "mature", if that makes sense. I may not have kids or be in a suit and heels all day everyday, but maturity can be achieved in many other different ways despite what anyone else says. One thing that will never ever change? Actually, I think there are quite a lot of things that I do like about myself, like being adventurous and never being scared of change, that I can also be a hard worker and accomplish much more when I have that 'right' mindset, I am a fast learner (even though that doesn't mean that I will take my time to learn how to cook HAHA), I am so creative I don't even know what to do with myself sometimes, I forgive easily, as outrageous as that sounds to some people, and even though I am not expressive AT ALL, not even my parents, with certain people I find myself doing things I never even thought of to show my affection, etc etc. There may be tons of people who might not "like" me, who may not accept me for who I am, weirdness and all, but I've learned to live with that. Comes with age I guess.
I am not sure where the next 12 months will take me or what kind of things or feelings or thoughts I will encounter, and while that sounds scary, it's also very intriguing.
(Esmirna at 3 years old...cue the "aww's" hehe)

xx

Tuesday, October 18, 2016

HEARTBREAKER'S CLUB

Tuesday, October 18, 2016








Photos by Henry Young
I WAS WEARING
SWEATER | Pull & Bear
JEANS | Storets
SHOES | *Courtesy of Missguided
SUNNIES | Prada

These past two weeks have been kinda rough, but I'll save the personal sappy stuff for another time. Here is a fun look I styled (sorta) casually for Storets...enjoy!
xx

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Thursday, October 06, 2016

UNCONVENTIONAL

Thursday, October 06, 2016
 
 
Photos by Henry Young
I WAS WEARING
DRESS | For Love and Lemons via Revolve
SHOES | *Courtesy of Missguided
EAR CUFF | Forever 21 


There is nothing, n o t h i n g  that I don't like about this dress, with all of it's sheer paneling and intricate details, it is truly what dreams are made of. The best part? You don't really have to add anything else to your look to make yourself stand out. Always a win in my book.

I'm heading off to the OC tomorrow to see Blink 182 and the All American Rejects, so I guess you can say I will pretty much be dead after that, almost literally. What are you guys up to?
xx

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Monday, October 03, 2016

THE ULTIMATE CAMEL COAT

Monday, October 03, 2016
 
Photos by Henry Young
I WAS WEARING
COAT | *Courtesy of Tobi
BLOUSE | thrifted
JEANS | *Courtesy of Missguided
BELT | thrifted
SHOES | *Courtesy of Banana Republic
PURSE | Marc Jacobs 

I like to pretend as if fall is ACTUALLY here, even though we all know that it probably won't arrive until the middle of December. Speaking of the end of the year, it seems as if this year is going to be a pretty busy one, from turning a year older this month (nooooo!), heading to Cancun/Playa Del Carmen/Tulum for a week in November, then coming back and heading back to Mexico for work for a few weeks...I think that this year's "Holiday Series" will either get cancelled or get pushed way ahead of schedule to accommodate everything I have planned, but I guess we shall see. Who else is excited that it is October finally?! I think I'm just gonna go home tonight and start decorating my ass off and NO ONE can tell me that I am going a bit crazy. 

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xx

*DISCLAIMER: Although Tobi sponsored this post, all opinions remain my own. 
PLATFORMS FOR BREAKFAST | by Esmirna Tapia
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